Some of these I heard.
Some of them I made up with the help of the deepest darkest part of my brain.
1.”The other Justin Bieber is of course Justin Timberlake.”
2. “Why are you acting like such a bitch? Are you on your period?”
3. “Dumbledore the Grey has two main tools that he uses,(besides magic of course) a lightsaber and a tricorder.” (Just insulted people who like starwars, star trek, Lord of the Rings and Harry Potter.)
4. “Oh is that why you’re fat?!”
5. “You know the first time I got herpes….”
6. “I really think we should just be friends.”
7. “No officer, you’re what they call in the business a Pig.”
8. “Excuse me flight attendant? Where is a nice private place to assemble my bomb?”
9. “Snap crackle and pop only reminds me of the holocaust.”
10. “I’ve thought about it and yes, Fags should burn in hell. Now lets get back to picketing this funeral.”
11.
No, it’s not like this girl is ever going to become a physician or anything. Though she’s already perfect for Walmart. Oh, was that offensive to people who work at Walmart? Ok, just put it as #12 then.
hahaha. I think Walmart’s feelings will be just fine.
Moses, as ever, you did a great job in making me laugh.
Btw, I’m stil waiting for that blogpost about” Life as an attractive female blogger”… You’ve made me curious.
Its coming I swear! I have to look for more hot ladies on the internet. For “research”
Nothing wrong with #2. That’s just good old debatin’
I think thats what they call a nuke in the debate.
“why are you acting up like a period? are you a bitch?”
hehehehe
Ohhh thats a good one!
11, just sad…
It is… very.
I don’t know if I’d want to take back number 11. I mean…in college we called those types of girls sorostitutes, if you know what I mean.
You know, she probably was a sorostitute. I mean her chances of banging the right guy and marrying him instead of studying to be a physician. It makes sense. She didn’t have to study.
I am certain the only reason why I haven’t literally bludgeoned to small pieces the person who has said #2 to me is the realistic fear that a bystander would say, “Wow, he must have been right.”
Its a double edged sword! You prove them right! So you just laugh it off and quietly poison them.