Bored? I’ve got some stuff for you to do.

Just a few ways to make your day more interesting.


  1. Buy a lotto ticket, on the next day go to check it, and whatever happens scream really loud, “OH MY GOD! YES! I WON!” In a crowded grocery store.
  2. Drive slow, with your hazard lights on and your music blaring. When people pass you, Yell at them, “HOW DO I TURN IT OFF!?” then wave and smile.
  3. Play the game, “Every time you see a cop run away fast.”
  4. For ladies, place or tape 1 mike and ike’s hard candies to each of your nipples under your shirt and go out on the town. For dudes, use a 1inch hexagonal nut.
  5. An hour before going to the gym, eat a lot of garlic, beans and onions. At the gym, do lots of cardio.
  6. Tape a book to your back, if anyone asks about it, call it your “bookbag” OR walk up to random strangers asking if they’ve seen your book. Then turn around and walk away grumbling.
  7. When speaking to strangers, end every sentence with, “you’re pretty.
  8. Wear two backpacks, one on your front and one on your back. Go through lots of doors and crowded areas, especially turnstiles.
  9. Wear hulk hands ALL DAY! (you can take them off to use the bathroom)



About MaximumWage

I don't wear shoes. And I habitually reinvent myself, like the wheel.
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6 Responses to Bored? I’ve got some stuff for you to do.

  1. lifewith4cats says:

    hahah these are all funny. except #7. Ive had that happen to me a lot whenever I talk to drunks. It gets old real fast. 🙂

  2. What a joy to come here and laugh. You really make your points clear. I like Run from the cops.

  3. dearsassy says:

    I tried yelling “Yay, I won!” in a crowded gas station, and I was surprised at how many friends I didn’t know I had that were suddenly surrounding me. I’m the most popular girl in my town now. Thanks!

  4. Pingback: Bored? Try These! | Maximum Wage

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