Married a Count, and is attributed as being the VERY FIRST COMPUTER PROGRAMMER as her notes on the first early mechanical general purpose computer constituted an algorithm. OH YEAH! did I mention it was the 1800s? YEAH GO FIGURE!
She always asked, “Why aren’t the boys asking for my digit?” No one got the joke.
She studied math to meet a nice boy, just like now a days a guy takes a yoga class to meet chicks. NOT saying I ever did that.
Catherine The Great (1729-1796)
One of the original Playahs, who didn’t have to sleep her way to the top, but damn well did after she made it.
Placed her “former” lover on the throne of Poland, in fact was known throughout her time to take many a lover. Giving many of them lands and slaves, even pensions. (pensions are money she continued to pay her lovers AFTER THEY WERE DONE BONING HER FOREVER) She slept with a LOT of DUDES. In fact, she’s probably the only case prior to the industrial revolution of “Workplace Sexual Harassment” as she was sleeping with men 40 years younger than her, even up to the day she died. (she died at 67)
Theodora Empress of the Byzantine empire (510-548)
Truly truly, there has never been another woman to sleep her way from the very bottom to the very tippy tippy top of society.
Her jobs from bottom to top:
Wool spinner, actress, mistress, prostitute, prostitute to the emperor’s son and THEN married to the emperor. (The laws were changed so that a nobleman could marry and actress) PSHAW!
Apparently Wool spinner and actress were just covers for prostituting. In fact every job a woman had in the ancient world was a cover for prostitution. You were a wool spinner by day and a Prostitute by night.
Dolly Madison, Genghis Khan’s Wife, Edith Piaf, Katie Couric, Madame Pompadour, Queen Victoria *the one emily blunt played* Queen Isabella, Budica, Shirley McClain, Cindy Crawford and Mary Magdalene.
WHO DID I FORGET?