Insults to have on hand.

Here are some insults for you to use whenever you need them. REMEMBER: If you can’t take it, then don’t dish it.

1. Everyone who loves you is wrong.

2. Your mom is a Muppet and your dad is a clown, congrats on the graduation to bat shit crazy.

3. You should be castrated/neutered I don’t want people seeing what you’re accidentally capable of.

4.The Jews didn’t deserve what happened to them, but you sure do.

5. There’s no other way to tell people how special you are other then to tape a handicapped sign to your body.

6. From what you’re saying you might as well switch your ass hole with your mouth, because I can’t tell the difference.

7. I’d call you retarded but I’d be insulting mentally handicapped people who are smarter then you.

8. You aren’t touched by God or an angel, you’re just touched.

9. You seem to be making all the right decisions for a 4yr old wearing a helmet.


About MaximumWage

I don't wear shoes. And I habitually reinvent myself, like the wheel.
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3 Responses to Insults to have on hand.

  1. Numbers 3 and 6-9… Love them. I shall try to rehearse some of these for the next time I feel like insulting someone. Thanks for sharing 🙂

  2. stitch witch says:

    Moses, these are hilarious! I am not sure I would personally use #5 simply because my son is handicapped (he has Bipolar). However, when the ex hubby thinks about being nasty again…..he’s gonna have another thing comin’ with one of these!

    BTW, long time stalker….you probably knew me as “Grim Ether.” I am now at

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