These Quotes Are Real.

“Sometimes I wish the English would win.”  General George Washington 1779

“Does anyone know what time it is? Oh that’s right, I have a clock hung around my neck via a chain.” Flava Flav.

“Eleanor, please! I hate doing girl on top, lets do girl on top in a wheel chair.” FDR 1942

“You know what?! I just wanted to see shit blow up.” Harry Truman 1945

“Pull my finger!” Your mom yesterday after having sex with me.

“I think Windows is better.” Steve Jobs on his death bed.

“DAYAM! These NEGROES BE some of the best workers in the country!”Abraham Lincoln 1863

“Let me explain how this will work, when I put my penis inside of you, you’ll orgasm so hard you’ll pass out and wake up 6 hours from now to an empty room.” Jon Hamm

“Dude, what if we flew?” Orville Wright to his brother Wilbur Wright

“The essence of man is that he labors in the world to provide for the well being of his family, his sacrifice extends to his time and his mortal self even when it means saving their lives from predators bent on destruction.”  Hulk Hogan.

“SUCK MY DICK!” Rosa Parks


About MaximumWage

I don't wear shoes. And I habitually reinvent myself, like the wheel.
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8 Responses to These Quotes Are Real.

  1. becca3416 says:

    You save the best for last, don’t you? Also, I happen to know for a fact that Jon Hamm said that to me. My mom is such a hoe.

  2. i came here because of Becca’s post today, and I’m glad I did. The Truman and Hulk Hogan quotes are my favorites, but they’re all pretty damned funny.

  3. I mean obviously these are all fake, except the Rosa Parks one.
    Nice post WordPress Wilson.

  4. ysobele says:

    I could even picture the illustrious Rosa Parks saying it.. “in yo’ face!!!” 😀

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