GUYS! GUYS! A Word Of Advice


seriously-guys

Guys, dudes, bros and even men lets get our act together ok? Just trying to help.

1. Guys! Frebreeze really works, deodorant too. Take showers, improve your hygiene DAILY! I believe in you!

2. Guys you can never have enough seduction techniques. Read, explore and learn all those tips and tricks to grab that lady or guy you always wanted. (Maybe “grab” wasn’t the right word)

3. Guys when you’re in the shower be sure to wash your butt hole and your taint… OK!?

4. If you have confidence issues NEVER EVER EVER look at your penis the wrong way through binoculars.

5. Learn new sports! Be active! Learn new activities and yes sex counts! (please refer to #2)

6. Guys every time you masturbate an angel gets its wings….A Victoria’s Secret angel that is…. AM I RIGHT!?

7. Guys if you do a lot of push ups it won’t give you man titties. So its cool to do them.

8. Guys, chivalry is dead mostly because we don’t ride horses and joust anymore, but you can always be a nice person and friendly to everyone you meet.

9. Guys lets all agree NOT to cock block each other. The law of the jungle should decide who the lady likes. (On a side note if I am drunkenly hitting on your wife and I don’t know its your wife please cock block me.)

10. Guys, only get a neck tattoo if you plan on attending prison. Also only get a tattoo on your butt if its funny.

11. Guys, if you’re a dad be a good dad.

Thats it.

 

 

 

 

 

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About MaximumWage

I don't wear shoes. And I habitually reinvent myself, like the wheel.
This entry was posted in Jobs, Life and the American Way and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

10 Responses to GUYS! GUYS! A Word Of Advice

  1. Pyx says:

    You are kind to help us ladies out Max. Add to number 3: Nothing worse than taking off some guys pants in the heat of passion and having to taste ripe-hockey-sweaty-balls or shmagma. No amount of of brushing with lard or swishing curdled milk can take that flavour away, listen to Max!

  2. List of X says:

    Seems easy enough. I think your advice #6 would prove the most popular, though.

  3. I can get behind supporting all of these fo sho. And for the American boys out there, the 2013 feminists aren’t the same as the miltant feminists of old. I enjoy both the benefits of equality and chivarly, so get that damn door and chair for me, would ya?

  4. er wait….getting dinner and drinks paid for is a whole part of the chivarly thing you know! But if I must, I must, I guess. Just this one time only, though.

  5. Pingback: GUYS GUYS A Word of ADVICE! *UPDATE* LAP DANCE! | Maximum Wage

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