Thoughts on Things 3


Here are some observations on life and a few other things a long the way. Enjoy!

Also here are part one and two. And yes I do plan on doing more of these. Also in advance I apologize for the racist joke.

Interrupting me:

Whenever I’m trying to tell a funny story and you interrupt me to tell your own, I’ll spend the rest of the evening thinking up a good burn on you that everyone will laugh at. SO DON’T DO IT!

On saying “God Bless you” when I sneeze:

I don’t see you saying that when I fart, and let me tell you I can’t control when I fart either.

When people use Soda or Pop or Coke:

Who cares what you call it? I never understood the American concept of turning fellow Americans into foreigners based on the different words they use for things.

Unicycles:

They said I would never learn to ride a bike. I showed them, I learned to ride the wheel.

Animals as they are being led to the slaughterhouse:

Cows: “YOU NEED ME! You need me to make milk! I know my production has been slipping just give me another chance!”

Pigs: “You need me to taste better! AND I’m not FAT ENOUGH!”

Chickens: “Hey guys they have food here!”

Different kinds of houses:

I would love a beaver house! A nice house on the water with a entrance that you had to swim to get inside. Sure the mold would be a problem BUT NO black people!

Fire hydrants and Firefighters:

Two things with the same job, to sit around until someone needs you.

Kids:

“Kids have their whole lives to waste in front of them.”

Songs:

Some songs get stuck in your head and others you can’t remember the artist or the name of the song. Maybe I’m just getting old.

 

 

 

 

 

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About MaximumWage

I don't wear shoes. And I habitually reinvent myself, like the wheel.
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One Response to Thoughts on Things 3

  1. You still got it. Keep pumping them out.

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